As we consider the TV offerings of the past year, a handful of shows stand out not for their excellence, but for their spectacular shortcomings. From cringe-inducing spin-offs to confusingly poor docuseries, here are the productions that had us scratching our heads or just reaching for the remote.
The 'Sex and the City' Sequel
Where to begin with this divisive spin-off? Plagued with woeful writing, cringe-inducing arcs (we demand better for Miranda!), and a paltry 71 seconds of fan-favourite Samantha, the series struggled to justify its existence. For a moment, as the third series started, it seemed as if it had at last found its groove. Then came an installment centered on Seema’s natural deodorant. Little surprise the creator declared this would be the last series. It concluded on a low point; the closeup of Miranda’s loo full of poo was simply too symbolic. Yet, fans certainly had a hoot picking apart every single “what on earth?” moment. And as Carrie – once again single – danced around her sprawling townhouse to Barry White, who couldn't let out a small sob?
All’s Fair
‘Is Kim Kardashian an actress? The answer is a resounding no.’
But that was almost the smallest of this show's issues. The subject of a exceedingly uncommon no-star review, it was hard to know where to begin enumerating the problems. The laughably wooden dialogue? The tedious glorification of wealth and materialism? The seemingly deliberate parade of cliches? Acting so poor they felt almost malicious? Suffice it to say “all of the above” and forget about this series again. However, a second season has been ordered, so we’re probably going to have to.
AKA Charlie Sheen
Given the restraining orders, domestic violence allegations and parental failures, it’s reasonable to say Charlie Sheen has been a troubled figure. Not that you’d really have gleaned it from this multi-part docuseries which smirked its way at Sheen’s various episodes of reckless hedonism while failing to tell us anything we didn’t already know. Rather, it felt as if this loose cannon was being pandered to, so any sympathy this series might induce should be saved for the people who have had to suffer close contact with this charming but flippant narcissist.
The Iris Affair
Of course we understood it was preposterous from the get-go: a drama about a supercomputer known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either solve global crises – or destroy all of humanity. We stuck with it out of sheer admiration for its stars … but by the end, it felt like even they had given up trying. One barely reacted when his character died, and the other ultimately slicing Charlie with an axe … in painfully slow-motion. Talk about admitting defeat.
MobLand
Shady figures meeting in empty boxing gyms? A certain band's Firestarter blaring in club scenes? The late 90s called and wants its gangland drama back.
In truth, that is harsh on the crime shows of the late 90s. Many seem a bit old-fashioned now, but at least they didn’t endure the ignominy of having to accommodate unconvincing accents. But there were plenty of other issues. Primarily that it was just really boring; a conflict over narcotics territory between various cockney rogues which felt rather simplistic.
With Love, Meghan
Considering the extent to which she provokes the ire of the nation’s performatively enraged commentators, it’s almost tempting to admire the Duchess of Sussex’s televised ventures into twee homemaking as deliberate statements. But then you view them and are compelled to admit that actually, they may have a point. It’s like watching a homeware magazine animated; a poster for evening drinks with ideas of grandeur; a parade of sleeping dogs, humming beehives, Hallmark platitudes and pointless crafting “tips” you’ll forget instantly. All supported by immense, mostly unearned wealth. Ugh.
The Beckham Documentary
There are obviously interesting things to be discussed about both Victoria Beckham and her struggles with career, self-image, self-worth. But for whatever reason, this documentary series opted not to explore them. Instead, the experience was akin to consuming a marketing brochure. She obviously has good reason to bridle at what she describes as her “stern” image. But unfortunately, she failed to do herself any helps with this cagey non-event of a series.
The Game Show
It had the potential to be the next cultural phenomenon – except even camper, with a famous star playing dead and a sharp-tongued personality managing her estate. What more could you ask for? As players competed, there was plenty of betrayal and squabbling. But the rules quickly became incomprehensible: it’s still too complicated to explain what exactly was happening. Even more regrettably, we only saw brief appearances of the star via filmed videos. The show ended up smelling of a production that was trying way too hard to live up to something far greater than it.
The Lena Dunham Romcom
How does one follow a show that captured a generation? The expectation was immense for this starry romantic comedy about Jessica, a hopeful New Yorker who arrives in London with a broken heart. The lead actress seized the opportunity by the horns and was joyous to watch, embodying Jane Austen levels of romantic notions. But it was all very slick and, paradoxically, was insufficient. Plus, the abundance of famous friends involved felt icky.
Mitchell & Webb Are Not Helping
Not good enough to be ‘patchy’.
Given the smart inclusion of talented younger comics, expectations were high. But sadly, most of it fell flat. A recurring sketch was a single joke milked to a dry pulp but recurring in every episode. One star seemed too ready to slip into a familiar ranting mode. The behind-the-scenes sketches, meanwhile, simply provoked the thought that they should probably have stayed in there a bit longer.
The Twisted Tale of Amanda Knox
This retelling of the story of Amanda Knox was overseen by Amanda Knox and pretty much solely showcased the viewpoint of Amanda Knox. So, while there probably is an compelling drama to be made about the tragic 2007 murder, this isn’t it. The material needed to be handled sensitively. Rather, the series struggled painfully to find the right tone, lumbering from oddly jaunty, somewhat stylised farce to ultimately, real-life horror. Complex? Perhaps. A complete mess? Absolutely.
Prime Target
We love the star … but did we buy him playing the greatest maths genius since, a man so smart he’s on the brink of a discovery that could destabilise society? No! This globe-trotting thriller about government agencies targeting – and killing off – academics honestly got more farcical by the second. Formulaic nonsense.
1000 Men and Me: The Bonnie Blue Story
This hagiography followed the online personality notorious for explicit exploits as she undertook her biggest challenge yet. What on earth would motivate her? What we craved was way more interrogation of her actual psyche, plus those of the men in the queue. They could at least have spoken to the legendary mum who appeared to drag her son out of the queue. What we got was horrific imagery and zero interrogation of her notoriety whatsoever. It's staggering to consider, the filmmaker has a young daughter too.
